PAPA

Once in my life I have this certain memory I couldn’t ever forget and I am convinced that all of us have this “memorable moment” and today I’m here in front of you to share my special story.

There was also a “once upon a time” in my life. It was not all found in fairytales and love stories. This time, it’s real and this is MY STORY.

I grew up in a family where I seldom see my father around because of the nature of his work. He was a police officer when he was still alive. He’s always away from us every time he performs his duties. There were also times when he was assigned to other places and he spent most of his times not to us but to his work. Saddened by this situation, I always asked my mother when will father gets home but since my mother doesn’t know either, I stopped asking. I will just wait for the moment when my father knocks at the door, hugs me and will say “I’m home son”. I learned to embrace this common scenario, “a home without a father” since I was a kid.

Being the eldest, I also witnessed how my two siblings longed for my father’s presence. I can see in their eyes the gladness every time my father is home. That is why when we are together we make sure that we enjoy each other’s company. My father spoils us with so many toys, candies, cakes and ice cream, the kinds of food that every child craves for. But having these things don’t complement the time he missed while he was away from us.
I reached the right age with the same scene at home yet I’m still lucky to have my mother to fill the emptiness that my father cannot meet. With the help of my mother, I hardly noticed that I spent most of my life without my father around. I didn’t feel that my life is incomplete but still I cannot ignore the fact that I’m still wishing and praying that I could spend special gatherings with my father such as birthdays and New Year.

Later on, I started to disregard my wishful thinking that father will soon be home and stays with us because the more I think of it, the more I miss him. It seems like a dream that is unreachable but like any child of God, I strongly hold on to my faith and earnestly pray that someday my family will be complete.

True enough, God answers to those who asked. On the first day of January 2008, father came home and spent New Year’s Eve with us. It was the happiest and memorable moment of my life. The fact that my father is not feeling well that time, he did not fail to spend a special celebration with his family. He did not waste his remaining time on something else instead he made sure that we are having fun, making the most of everything.

We spent an extravagant new year not only because father was there but also we recognized it as a blessing for the family and for our lives. Father treated us generously with mouth-watering dishes which he personally cooked. I forgot to mention that my father cooks very well and that is one of the things I miss the most about him. My mother was very happy seeing her husband busy preparing foods for his children. It was a dramatic moment for her.

Maybe you will ask what’s memorable about this story and maybe you will say “it’s just an ordinary tale “. Well I say NO, it was not an ordinary story for me, for my mother and for my siblings. It was the most special one because for 27 years of my existence, it was the very first time that we spent New Year together as far as I can remember. It was the very first time we witnessed the year to end and the New Year to unfold. It was the very first time that we exchanged hugs and kisses together. It was the first time we welcome a new chapter of our lives together.

That New Year of 2008 was a year that left a very special memory for me and for my family. I could have never thought that it was our first and last new year together. It pains me a lot knowing that we shared only one New Year when in fact I waited for him for about 20 years and more to spend that very special day with us. But just like what they always say every story has its ending and so is mine. It wasn’t a very happy ending yet if I look back and if I see myself now, it wasn’t bad after all.

As much as I wanted him to see where I am now and as much as I wanted to tell him that I am now a BEM student, I couldn’t. But if it happens that he is still alive, I hope he will be proud of his son.

Until now, I’m still teary-eyed every time I remember the feeling and the picture of my happy family especially now that father is gone. It was a very memorable memory he left for us. How I wish I could still extend his life to spend more New Years Eve with him but I can’t so I’m satisfied with the memory I had with him and I will cherish it forever. Now Papa will no longer have to say I’m home Son because I will tell him “Papa you are always at home here in my heart”.